Social Comes First
Yesterday evening, after a busy work day, I found myself on a chilly rooftop in Manhattan sans cigar and cocktail — unfortunately. Thankfully, the topic was so intriguing to me that I didn’t need much artificial stimulant.
You can safely imagine that it turned to the world of private clubs.
My friend — a Gen Z corporate dropout with a philosophy degree and entrepreneurial mindset — was bemoaning the lack of IRL experiences, primarily in the dating market. That, of course, led to us speaking of the great club renaissance that’s occurring right before our eyes.
Somewhere in between my sharing a personal ranking of my club’s reciprocity list, he interrupted and asked, “Leonard, what makes a really good club?”
My answer was simple: clubs that actually create social conditions where members can actually socialize with one another.
The English have mastered the art of getting together and sitting apart. Americans are different. We’re a far more social bunch than we’re willing to give ourselves credit for. Our country’s history is deeply fraternal to the point that we’re overrun with conspiracy theories about organizations that have to run ads to gain members. (See Freemasons).
If you’re going to incorporate large spaces for the parties that you’re expecting your club to throw, never leave that space empty. Always have couches, tables and don’t be afraid to break them off into mini-nooks scattered across a large room. This encourages every single corner of the Club to be seen as a socialization space rather than regimented room structures. You can see how the Yale Club does a fine job of this here.
Don’t take my word for it, either. Hire an architect and interior designer who understands how to build spaces that spur conversation and chatter.
Club Tables and Billiards Tables are essential to hitting both ends of the gender spectrum’s preferred method of socializing wiht one another. Men are more prone to socialize around meaningful activity, such as sinking the 8-ball, while women are more likely to have the magical ability to simply just strike up a conversation with one another.
As I told my friend, “There’s an informal test that I use to assess whether I believe a club will make it for the next 50 years.”
His eyes perched up as he leaned in closer.
“If I can approach someone seated alone nursing a martini and say, “Hello, I’m Leonard. Do you mind if I join you here?” and the question is taken with surprise, I want to politely email our article on club shutdowns to their listserv,” I replied.
Do everything in your power to make sure that your Club is as far removed from that as possible.
Brilliant observatin about physical space actually driving social interaction. The mini-nooks concept makes so much sense becasue large open spaces can feel intimidating to approach strangers in, but cozy corners signal that conversations are expected and welcome. I remember my college library had these random alcoves scattered around, and people would just naturally strike up study group chats there way more than in the main reading room.